Sideboob is just the best thing. It’s like one of nature’s wonders.
There has been loads of debate (and piss taking, bitching and moaning) about the Opening Ceremony of the Commonwealth Games 2014.
We were lucky enough to be at the dress rehearsal on Monday night. There were bits I wasn’t sure about, that I didn’t really get and bits I loved.
After watching it on telly last night, I haven’t changed my mind. There was crappy scripting, a whole lot of cheese and gimmickry. Aye, Subo forgot some words. Aye, Rod Stewart isn’t the greatest singer.
But what did Glasgow give to the world? An unashamedly Scottish show. Tartan, Irn Bru, dancing Tunnocks Teacakes. It showed the world that no one takes the piss out of Scotland better than we do ourselves. We don’t take ourselves too seriously but we make important choices. We had a gay kiss televised the world over. We had Scottie dogs bringing in the athletes. Dogs. Who does that?! We had bouncing tunes and a baton they couldn’t open (all hail Sir Chris Hoy!). We had an incredible act of united charity.
And when it really counted, we had sunshine.
So folk can whine and complain all they like, I watched a show that demonstrated one thing - Scotland is a proud nation and I’m bursting with pride to be part of it.
Yes it was camp as fuck, yes it was sickeningly stereotypical but it was probably the most important commonwealth opening ceremony ever.
In 42 of 54 of the commonwealth countries being a homosexual will see you put in prison, even executed. What did Scotland do?
Well, we brought out our biggest gay and our biggest lesbian, paraded them around on a tartan bus singing and got 2 men to kiss infront of an estimated audience of 1 billion people.
Sook ma tartan plooms.